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My legs feel like I bashed them up and down on asphalt for an hour, but that is okay. Well, it is only okay because it is true. My ambitions require a different body, and you could call these growing pains. Or you could call me a fool that is forty and trying to get a last hurah before he gets too old. The pain is a minor little thing and gives my brain something to play with.
I should have seen my daughter today, and I suspect I will not see her until we go to court and a judge makes her see me. Losing a child isn't so easy. Running to the next mailbox when it feels like you might cough up a lung isn't so bad, neither is a back kick to the face. The body isn't so unrelenting as the mind, at least not at forty.
My mother has been here for about a month. My dad left her here and went back to Florida for business. Neither one seems to be in a hurry to move back in with the other. Having her here is kind of interesting. She takes over whenever I try to cook and now I let her just to avoid a fight. She doesn't drive so I have to take her shopping. She seems unable to focus on a list and instead wanders around like a toddler throwing crap into the cart until it is full. She cooks pretty well and uses my dad's credit card when we go out. She has been good for my oldest daughter, so things are working out in an odd way.
The sky has been this clear blue little thing for a while and the grass always seem to be so green. Inside my mother is sleeping in her bed, and Stubs the wonder cat is licking himself on my bed. Inside further still, I am attempting to focus my thoughts into words that maybe you could understand. It is like trying to string fleas on fishing line. And maybe at the end you can't understand completely in the same way that I cannot always understand you. Still, I know I appreciate the effort. I kind of hope my daughter sees the effort and the intention some day.
I should have seen my daughter today, and I suspect I will not see her until we go to court and a judge makes her see me. Losing a child isn't so easy. Running to the next mailbox when it feels like you might cough up a lung isn't so bad, neither is a back kick to the face. The body isn't so unrelenting as the mind, at least not at forty.
My mother has been here for about a month. My dad left her here and went back to Florida for business. Neither one seems to be in a hurry to move back in with the other. Having her here is kind of interesting. She takes over whenever I try to cook and now I let her just to avoid a fight. She doesn't drive so I have to take her shopping. She seems unable to focus on a list and instead wanders around like a toddler throwing crap into the cart until it is full. She cooks pretty well and uses my dad's credit card when we go out. She has been good for my oldest daughter, so things are working out in an odd way.
The sky has been this clear blue little thing for a while and the grass always seem to be so green. Inside my mother is sleeping in her bed, and Stubs the wonder cat is licking himself on my bed. Inside further still, I am attempting to focus my thoughts into words that maybe you could understand. It is like trying to string fleas on fishing line. And maybe at the end you can't understand completely in the same way that I cannot always understand you. Still, I know I appreciate the effort. I kind of hope my daughter sees the effort and the intention some day.